Introduction: The Vanishing Village
You have probably heard this phrase “It takes a village to raise a child”
But today that village feels like it has disappeared.
With long working hours, less help from extended family, and pressure to be the perfect parent, many moms and dads feel like they are doing everything by themselves. If you feel tired or lonely or wonder why parenting is so hard, you are not alone
Let us explore what changed and how we can bring back the feeling of support in our lives
Then vs. Now: Parenting Communities Over Time
In the Past: Natural Help Was Always Nearby
In earlier times, extended families often lived together or close to each other. Grandparents, cousins, and neighbors would regularly help with child care, offering support without being asked or judged.
Today: Alone in a Hyper-Individualized Era
Now, families are usually spread out, living far from relatives. Even though online communities exist, it is harder to find real emotional and hands-on support. Parents today take on many roles like caregiver, teacher, cook, entertainer, and worker, often with very little time to rest.
The True Cost of Going It Alone
1. Mental Health Challenges
Many parents feel anxious or overwhelmed. For example, a new mother might cry at night from exhaustion and loneliness.
2. Relationship Struggles
Couples often argue more when there is no support. When both partners are tired and stressed, even small issues can turn into big fights.
3. Pressure from Social Media
Online it looks like other parents have perfect homes and happy children. But behind the camera there may be mess and stress that you do not see. This can make you feel like you are not doing enough.
4. Lost Culture and Traditions
Without grandparents nearby, children may miss out on family stories and cultural values that once came from elders.
What Happened to the Village?
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Moving Away from Home:
Jobs and school often make families move away from their hometowns and the people they know. -
Overwhelming Schedules:
Busy daily lives leave very little time to connect with others around you. -
Trust Issues and Judgment:
Parents sometimes feel worried about being judged or don’t know who they can trust, especially when parenting styles are different. -
More screen time less with people:
We spend so much time on phones and screens that real, face-to-face connection happens less often.
Rebuilding Connection in the Modern Age
Even if your support system doesn’t live nearby, it's still possible to build a “village” in creative, meaningful ways.
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Start small close to home
Join or create small groups with parents nearby in your neighborhood, your child’s school or apartment. These groups can help with watching kids sharing feelings or just having someone to talk to over coffee. -
Use online groups carefully
Join parenting groups on Facebook WhatsApp or BabyCenter for advice and support. But be careful not to compare yourself too much or believe everything you read. -
Don’t be afraid to ask for help
Asking for help does not mean you are failing. Talk to friends, neighbors or experts when you need support. Being honest helps build trust and friendships. -
Spend time together in real life
Online groups are helpful but nothing beats meeting face to face. Plan playdates, meals or casual meetups with other parents. Family bike rides are a great way to spend real time outdoors with your kids and other parents. Gro Club offers bicycles that grow with your child, making outdoor bonding simple and joyful. -
Teach your kids about community
Help your children learn the importance of kindness, helping others and making connections. This is how we bring back strong communities.
Final Thoughts: You Were Never Meant to Do This Alone
Modern Parenting today can feel very lonely, but it does not have to stay that way. Your “village” might be smaller, far away, or online, but with effort, it can still give you the support you need.
Let’s make it normal to ask for help, be there for each other, and create a sense of community again.
Because no matter the time, it always takes a village to raise a child.
